another update

Hey everyone, hope you're all doing well

It feels about time for another random journal.

Soon after my last journal about my progress on the mental health front I had started a second medication in tandem with the antidepressant I had been taking. As is the pattern, it seemed to work at first, briefly, then seemed to make me worse. Currently I feel like what's really going on is that it's working no better than nothing at all, as I still have random problems caused by mood/depression/whatever.

What bothers me is that it's inhibiting my ability to feel excitement and emotion. I feel like at times I have a clear head, but I don't feel anything to drive me. When I was self medicating with cannabis what struck me was how emotional I was, and although with the floodgates wide open I was going from one extreme to another, I'd much prefer that over what I've been going through this past year. File that under bad medical advice though

Several days ago isthisthingstillon featured one of my photos as a DD, an untitled shot I took in an alley in China town (Untitled). It's the first time a non-CSS deviation of mine has received a DD, so in a sense I feel like it's my first DD. It's given me a jolt of positive energy that's helped me get more active around here.

I've been pushing myself to keep taking photos. Some days are better than others - both in terms of my mood and in terms of there being anything photo worthy (and I know they are intertwined).

Wish I had some links for a little linkdump at the end but I got nothing